Being completely relaxed in your own skin is one of the definitions of personal power, not, as some people may think, exerting your will over others. Finding a way to achieve what you want without hurting anyone else, and benefitting everyone involved is also another definition. Being true to yourself, without trampling or disregarding the advice of others shows that you have a strong belief in who you are and what you are doing.
Some people think that to exert personal power, you must do it at the expense of someone else. That someone loses in the exchange…but true power is creating win/win results in every situation you find yourself, whether it be within a relationship, your work, etc.
Personal power enables you to have strong, yet serene confidence in yourself, being neither overly assertive or modest. Having it allows you to express yourself as being worthy of being heard, and assume that your “beingness” is worthy of respect. By being secure in your self, you can also extend that respect to others around you. So, there is no downside to owning your power, on the contrary, it makes you more sensitive and compassionate to those around you.
You can connect with your personal power simply by breathing into your solar plexus and feeling what that feels like right now. Is it tight, weak, or heavy, or does breathing there feel relaxed and expansive? Does this kind of expanded breath into your belly give you a feeling of satisfaction or does it create a sense of anxiety?
Vivation increases personal power by enhancing self-esteem. You indeed feel like a unique and worthy individual and that your thoughts and aspirations mean something. You feel that you have an important contribution to make by being yourself, and that uniqueness begins to shine through the more you realize that you ARE okay, and always have been.
So begin to develop a more positive relationship to your own personal power by Viving into the activating feelings created by facing challenging activities in your life. Use that activation, and its eventual resolution, as a means of gaining confidence in your ability to integrate any and all of your negative emotions, and watch your personal power grow!